Buckeye Tax Money Giveaway Program

It had to happen. Here is a story from today’s AZ Republic. Buckeye Giveaway0001

And the following conversation was reported today to howardsgoodyearblog by an anonymous Buckeye tipster. This conversation allegedly took place last year between Buckeye businessmen Mac and Joe. The names have been changed to protect the guilty….

Hey Mac, what’s all this sheeit about Goodyear giving $500k to Dick’s Sportin’ Goods so’s they can put in a sewer line and locate their new distribution center along the 303 and ship stuff to California but not have to abide by all of California’s reg a lations?

Yeah, Joe, what is all that sheeit about giving feriners from Pennsylvania stuff so they come here to set up shop while you and I bin trying to make a living with our little shops here in Buckeye, payin taxes all these years and we don’t get sheeit.

Yeah, we don’t get sheeit.

Don’t you know Buckeye Mayor Jackie? He’s a-runnin for re-election soon and we need to get him to promise us some a that sheeit that these corporate boys over in Tire town-goodcheer is gettin.

Yeah, I know ‘im but he don’t know sheeit. He’s dummer than the dwarfs over in tire town on a good day.

Well that’s even better. If he don’t know sheeit, then we can tell him what to do.

Like what?

OK, well Tiretown’s got an eco nomic d’veloper job over there don’t they?


Well let”s tell Jackie that we need to hire us one a those city promotin eco nomic d’velpers ova here in Buckeye and then when we git one, we can have him propose to give us some a that sheeit like Dick’s got.

Well how we gonna convince ’em of that?

Do like all those fancy type tiretown political folks do. Have a meetin and call it a summit or some such sheeit and invite all us local business guys to it. Then we all tell the new eco devlper that the local boys need some sheeit like Dick’s got. You know, all them rules and reg-a-lations we gotta deal with.

That might actually work, Mac. Why all those fancy college educated city promotin types who couldn’t get private sector jobs always want to get in the newspaper with some idiot idea to spend money. Hell, Lord Mayor Georgia over there in tire town must be in twenty something government promotin’ clubs that spend all their time thinkin’ up ways to spend folks money. Those ef’ers think they create jobs and stuff. None of em has ever had a job doing any real work except for the government so it’s no wonder. So long as no taxpayers are watchin real close like that sheeit-head blogger over there in tire town givin those tire town politicians crap about every dime they spend this could sail right through, Mac.

Yeah, and if we can’t get ’em to just flat out give us some money, my nephew is a consultant and we can at least get some work for him to come around and drink coffee with us and meet. My sister’s had it real bad in this recession. She’s sauced up a lot on account of her ‘condition’ so she’s got a lot a trouble keepin a job but I know I can get her kid to give her some of the proceeds if you and I generate it for him by havin Buckeye pay his con sult tin business some money.

I thought your nephew was a drug dealer?

Nawh, that’s a “home based business” don’t ya know? I say he’s a con-sul-tant!

What condition is it that your alkey sister has?

She lives in the middle of ef-in nowhere, Buckeye, AZ and it drives her nuts, that’s what.

Mac you’re an ef’in genie-ous.

No I ain’t. They’re just a bunch a dummer ‘en rocks politickers in these small towns and ain’t nobody wachin ’em. They got access to taxpayers pocketbooks and I want my piece of that sheeit. Now let’s go find Jackie.

Arizona Constitution, Art. 9 § 7, the “gift” clause.
Neither the State, nor any county, city, town, municipality or other subdivision of the State shall ever give or loan its credit in the aid of, or make any donation or grant, by subsidy or otherwise, to any individual, association, or corporation, or become a subscriber to, or a shareholder in, any company or corporation, or become a joint owner with any person, company or corporation, except as to such ownerships as may accrue to the State by operation or provision of law or as authorized by law solely for investment of the monies in the various funds of the state.

Recent AZ Supreme Court Decision Gift Clause Opinion


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