Article #322. Not All Leftys Are Kooks

Caution; Viewer Discretion Advised

 Disclaimer to Article 322.
howardsgoodyearblog (the writer and blog owner, hereinafter identified as “blogger”) is not responsible for the content or possible infection of your computer due to “conservative biased electrons” (hereinafter referred to as CBEs) which may or may not be transmitted through the blogosphere and infect your computer if you click on certain “links” (hereinafter referred to as “links”).

 Undocumented studies by certain far left leaning individuals (hereinafter referred to as “leftys”) claim that clicking on links to what they define as conservative websites is extremely dangerous and can be detrimental to…. well, something, we’re not sure what that something is but we will try to define it below.

 These studies arrive at the conclusion that:

the RIGHT hand side of your computer keyboard may become dangerous to use after you have clicked on the aforementioned CBE “links”.

 “Leftys” further claim that if one is far enough to the left in one’s political persuasions, that your right hand (if you use all five fingers to type) or at least your right index finger can inexplicably absorb CBEs and thereby some of the conservative thoughts, facts, and data which support right leaning opinions if one uses a computer keyboard which has been previously infected as a result of clicking on the aforementioned “links”. For detailed information on this phenomenon, tune into the 8 hour upcoming MSNBC special on this topic hosted by Martin Bashir.

 To the unaware liberal, the results of  right hand side keyboard infection can be catastrophic!!
For example:

  1. The number keys 6,7,8,9,and 0 as well as the + key may become unusable to tax and spend liberals. Think of the disastrous consequences!  Liberals would not be able to type the Federal Debt at a number higher than $55 trillion!  They would not be able to use the + sign in order to lard on more unsustainable, inefficient, nanny state, programs which some day “might” operate at the “speed of private business”.
  2. The word KOOK would no longer be useable in type in order to describe anyone with conservative opinions who disagrees with them.
  3. The word deficit would have to be written defct and might be confused with “defect” and the statement, “it is OK to increase the deficit” would become nonsense.
  4. Obama would become _ba_a. Who really would believe that sheep were responsible for the IRS debacle or lying about Benghazi?
  5. The phrase, “the government needs more of your tax money to waste” would become nearly unintelligible as, “t e g ver  e t  eeds   re  f    r tax   e t  s e d”.

As bad as this might seem to liberals everywhere, fear not. All is not lost, even if your computer inadvertently becomes infected with right leaning electrons (CBEs).

All the letters for your favorite word are still available to you. TAXES.

And now that you have read the disclaimer, here is Article 322.

Article 322 Starts Here
Not all leftys are kooks.


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